My temple is within me.

Had an argument with M over going to the temple. M said I was responsible for M's last minute tantrums because of which I kud not go to the temple on ashtami which is supposed to be highly auspicious for the goddess.
But I frankly am happy I din go....because there is no point in showing false devotion when I am actually not calm from within. I find more peace at home instead of in the presence of so many ppl. I dont get paranoid when I view the deity like M does. I find this very irritating about M. M gets hyper beyond what is required. Prolly Thats why I am the exact opposite...nothing matters too much to me. If you can feel God within you then that experience is more than what you would ever get by going to the temple or any place of worship. If you can feel God within you, you would not make life hell for others everyday and claim to be very devoted and true to God.
M interprets everything ....and that too wrong interpretations. Just because I could not go to the temple does not mean the Goddess does not want me to come.....N this is what M interprets that too when it was M who created hassles and then blamed me for having a bloated ego.

WELL....I HARDLY CARE.!

Im gonna light the lamp as usual...its something I love doing. Nothing can deter me from being happy